The Bankster

TITLE: THE BANKSTER

AUTHOR: RAVI SUBRAMANIAN

PUBLISHER: RUPA PUBLICATIONS

ISBN: 978-81-291-2048-9

GENRE: FICTION

PAGES: 358

SOURCE: BLOGADDA

RATING: 3/5

Back cover says:

In Angola, a covert CIA agent is about to exchange weapons for blood diamonds.

In Kerala, an elderly man will do whatever it takes to fulfil a promise made to a dying son.

In Mumbai, an international bank is stunned by the mysterious death of its key employees.

Bankers build their careers on trust, or so everyone thinks, till a series of murders threaten to destroy the reputation that the Greater Boston Global Bank (GB2) has built over the years. Who is behind these killings, and what is their motive? Is the banker at GB2 fast turning into a bankster? Or was he always one?

When Karan Panjabi, press reporter and ex-banker, digs deeper, he realises that he has stumbled upon a global conspiracy with far reaching ramifications- a secret that could not only destroy the bank, but also cast a shadow on the entire nation.
With only thirty-six hours at his disposal, he must fight the clock and trust no one if he has to stay alive and uncover the truth.

Spinning an intricate web of lies, deceit and treachery, bestselling author Ravi Subramanian, a master storyteller of financial crime and winner of the 2008 golden Quill Reader’s Choice Award, returns with his most gripping thriller yet.

Raumali's views:

When I received the book first from blogadda, I was thrilled by the concept of a mystery thriller revolving around a bank. Flipping through the pages, I was really engrossed by many subplots in a single story. I was hungry for more, to reach the end. Unfortunately, I was disappointed.

The book is a combination of three stories set in three different cities.

Joseph Braganza- An immovable force. A High flyer, yet six feet under. Smart, Suave, efficient, Resourceful, secretive yet hostile. He is a covert CIA agent who comes to Angola with a deal of blood diamonds.

Krishna Menon- A middle class elderly, who lost his only son to an radioactive accident. It was at this point that he decided to go to any means to keep his hometown safe from the upcoming nuclear power plant.

Greater Boston Global Bank Mumbai- An International Bank, fallen prey to serial murders and an intricate web of conspiracies. A place where everyone’s a victim but no one is innocent.

The main book is based with the story of GB2 with the first few stories just popping in between. How do they connect?

Krishna Menon- who lost his son in the Chernobyl nuclear accident, made a promise to his dying son, to do everything possible to keep the residents of his hometown safe from the upcoming nuclear power plant. He shakes hand with Jayakumar, in a protest against the government, to come clean and transparent about the plant. His protest in on the Gandhian principle. But can Jayakumar be trusted? Is he using Menon?

Vikram, Tanuja, Nikhil, Anand, Indrani, Harshita, Zinaida, Raymond- The employees of the bank who are supposed to build their careers on trust. But can they go to any extent to reach their targets, even while keeping the trust of their colleagues and customers alive without thinking about any of them or the repercussions on the bank. Is power meant to be misused? Who is deceiving whom? Can anyone be trusted? Why are the employees being murdered?

When Karan Panjabi, press reporter and ex-employee of GB2, searches the roots of these murders, he finds himself stumbled upon a global conspiracy which combines all these three stories.

The story lacks intricate detailing. The plot is strong but none of the characters are detailed. Also the main protagonist of the tale comes in only the last 100 pages and what seems like a hasty end. All his characters lack depth.

Nonetheless, the story is good, the mystery is thrilling and I would recommend giving it a try.

This review is a part of the Book Reviews Program at BlogAdda.com . Participate now to get free books!

The Krishna Key

TITLE: THE KRISHNA KEY

AUTHOR: ASHWIN SANGHI

PUBLISHER: WESTLAND LTD

ISBN: 978-93-81626-68-9

GENRE: MYSTERY, MYTHOLOGICAL

PAGES: 464

SOURCE: BLOGADDA

RATING: 4/5

BACK COVER SAYS:

Five thousand years ago there came to earth a magical being called Krishna who brought about innumerable miracles for the good of mankind. Humanity despaired of its fate that if the Blue God were to die but was reassured that he would return in a fresh avatar when needed in the eventual Dark Age, the Kaliyug. In modern times a poor little rich boy grows up believing that he is that final avatar. Only, he is a serial Killer.

In this heart stopping tale, the arrival of a murderer who executes his brilliantly thought out schemes in the name of God is the first clue to a sinister conspiracy to expose an ancient secret- Krishna’s priceless legacy to mankind.

Historian Ravi Mohan Saini must breathlessly dash from the submerged remains of Dwarka and the miserious lingam of Somnath to the Key heights of Mount Kailash, in a quest to discover the cryptic location of Krishna’s most prized possession. From the sand washed ruins of Kalibagan to a brindaban temple destroyed by Aurangazeb, Saini must also delve into antiquity to prevent a gross miscarriage of justice.

Ashwin Sanghi brings you yet another exhaustively researched whopper of a plot, while providing an incredible alternative interpretation of the Vedic Age that will be relished by conspiracy buffs and thriller addicts alike.

RAUMALI’S VIEWS:

Thanks to Blogadda, this is the first time I am reading Ashwin Sanghi and I must say it was worth it. The book kept me pinned down at a stretch for 8 hours. It’s totally amazing.

The book revolves around 108 chapters. It is not just a mystery thriller, there’s a lot of history hidden in it. 

As I started reading the book, I liked Krishna’s narration of his life at the beginning of each chapter. Two different stories comprise the book, one of Krishna’s life decades back and one of the story of today.

Historian Ravin Mohan Saini, following the death of his best friend Anil Varshney is set out to unlock the hidden mystery of the ‘Krishna Key’, while running from the police for being accused for murders by a serial killer who considers himself the tenth avatar of Krishna.

Ashwin has put a lot of research and hard work into making this book. This book is a definite page turner. It may seem hard to understand at first but after some pages the reader will get engrossed in the mystery and the mythology presented in the book. Throughout all information provided about India’s history and invention has been justified with facts and correct logic. The writer has taken care of the reader’s and the characters’ sentiments every time God has been mentioned.

It is a surprisingly breezy read and the way the climax comes is awesome. It doesn’t satisfy you, you keep yearning for more.

Though a good read, there are some parts in the book which turns one off. In some parts he just stretches the plot which gets a little boring. The amount of research Ashwin has put in shows in the book and you end up searching for the actual plot.

Inspite of the loopholes I was quite impressed with the book and I would love to read more of Ashwin Sanghi’s works.

This review is a part of the Book Reviews Program at BlogAdda.com. Participate now to get free books!

The Clockwork Man

TITLE: The Clockwork Man
AUTHOR: William Jablonsky
PUBLISHER: Grey Oak Publishers in association with westland ltd.
ISBN: 978-93-81626-53-5
GENRE: Fiction
PAGES: 231        
SOURCE: Blogadda
RATING: 3.5/5

BACK COVER SAYS:

Karl Gruber, a world-famous builder of automated clocks, has reached the pinnacle of his art in Ernst-a man constructed entirely of clockwork. 

Educated and raised in the Gruber household to be a gentle caring soul, Ernst begins to discover a profound love for his master’s daughter, Giselle. Just as their relationship becomes intimate, however, tragedy strikes and the family falls apart. Abandoned, knowing no other life but the one he has led, Ernst allows himself to wind down in a kind of suicide. 

Over a hundred years later, he awakens in a strange new land, the world he’s known now long gone. Along with his mentor and guide, a well-meaning if slightly unstable homeless man, Ernst attempts to piece together the events that brought him to his new home- and to let go of the century old tragedy that still haunts him.

RAUMALI’S VIEWS:

I have never read a Science fiction before. As I started reading this book, I thought it was some kind of Sci-fi. After going through a few pages, I realised I was wrong. The book is much more than that.

As I started reading the book, I thought it would be boring. But as I traversed through the pages, it grew more and more interesting and a time came when I just couldn’t put the book down without completing it.

The book is basically the diary of Ernst, the main protagonist of the tale, a clockwork man built by the world famous clockmaker Karl Gruber. Gruber educated Ernst in theoretical subjects, language, history and geography as well as raised him to be gentle and caring. Ernst helps Gruber with his projects and also takes care of his family. He cannot stop himself from falling in love with his master’s daughter. Soon tragedy strikes the family and the course of events lead to the family falling apart. Unable to cope with the pain and loss, Ernst winds himself down to some kind of suicide.

He wakes up a hundred years later in a strange unknown land and his wish to know about the trail of events that led him there triggers his instincts for survival. But he is not really able to forget the century old tragedy that still haunts him.

The main attraction of the story is the character of Ernst. He is humble, gentle, caring, patient and with a conscience. Jablonsky very deftly portrayed Ernst’s character which makes the book all the more interesting.

The best part about the book I liked is that the author makes the readers think. Sometimes it seems as all of it is real and I really had to turn back to check whether it was a work of fiction. The narration seems real and the events flash before our eyes. At some parts, it even made me cry. The sentiments, the feelings said by the mechanical man all seemed real.

The only disappointment I faced was that even though the book was interesting, some parts were so boring that I didn’t feel like continuing to read. But then again it regained it’s former glory. Also few incidents are too real to be true for a mechanical man.

Nonetheless it’s a great read for sure. 

This review is a part of the Book Reviews Program at BlogAdda.com

New Beginnings

I know I have been bad, a very bad blogger, staying away from you so long. But now I am back, and I promise to be less lazy and spend a little more time with you.

The past one year have been really a eventful year. No I don't blame anyone for that, that was exactly what I always wanted. I wanted life to surprise me by the time I turned twenty, give me loads of memories. It did too. My great adventure which landed me in the hospital for three months, depriving me of two of my college fests.... Meeting new people... Friendship, trust, love, betrayal.... and finally growing up. 

Learnt somethings are totally not meant to be, no matter how much you want or how hard you try, and the only thing you have to do in the end is to loosen the strings and let it go. Time heals everything, we just need to give it some time and keep patience. We don't need to change our self for someone, we are all unique in our own way. The only people who will go with us till the end are the ones who can be with us for the way we are. The rest will leave eventually, as they don't belong to our tribe. So it's no use brooding over them.

Finally I am having some good days. The summer vacation kept me a lot busy, and finally after a lot of hard work, today I found the little sapling growing from the seed of my tree I decided to plant 3 months ago. I have cleared ACET and now I am really proud to be a student of INSTITUTE OF ACTUARIES OF INDIA.  Need to work really hard for another 4-5 years to taste the sweet fruit of this tree.

I am leaving for Durgapur tomorrow after which I will concentrate on my internships, the actuarial studies and have also planned to start working on my first novel.

Finally it's time to move on and give my dreams the shape of reality....

P.S.- For those who are wondering what happened to my blog challenge, I am keeping that on hold for sometime, will be completing it when I again feel like it :)

My Five Pet Peeves

*Sigh* I know I am blogging really less and I am even not keeping up with the blog challenge rules... I did have a few reasons for the same-

1. I was busy with my story writing blog, Kaleidoscope

But then the story got over, after I somehow dragged it really slow and it was making screeching sounds :P, so I had to find a different reason...

So I thought of giving this...

2. I am doing a lot of studying lately, I have a exam at the end of the month( Don't ask me any question on this as this will further lead to more questions), and I am doing this thing called Ungineering( Don't tell me to explain what it is), and I was doing some Stanford courses (which I dropped after day two)

But seriously speaking, this was no reason, as I was sleeping more than studying ( I purposely made up reasons for that too), and I studied too late as I was crossing one reason with the another)

So this was another failed reason...

3. So finally I have found the perfect reason, I have become too lazy, and yes please bear with me for that :D

So coming back to today's blog challenge topic, My Five pet peeves, umm, tough but here it goes

1. I hate it when I am doing something really seriously, maybe reading a book or programming and someone texts me or pings me continuously...

 2. It seriously turns me off when I really want to talk to someone and the person doesn't reply back to my text messages.

3. When I am at home and studying, and my mum turns the TV to the loudest volume. 

4. The professor takes attendance the days I don't go.

5. I am given some work when I am feeling too lazy. 

A Book I Love

I can't be really specific about the types of books I like, it depends on my mood. Sometimes I love to read mystery, detective novels, thrillers, sci-fi or just plain simple over the coffee reads.

One book I recently read which touched my heart was LIFE IS WHAT YOU MAKE IT by PREETI SHENOY

I remember picking up this book from crosswords stall at Junction Mall in Durgapur while returning to college after Holi with my dad. I was in a mood for some light reading and I wasn't sure what to take when I saw this one. I took this book as I liked the title and the review on the back cover and thought this would be something I might like. Also I found the price affordable.

Needless to say, I wasn't dissapointed. As soon as I started reading it I was glued to the book until I finished it, even forgetting the fact that I had a lab viva the next morning for which I wasn't even prepared. *oops!*

Coming to the story in brief-

The book revolves around the life of a girl Ankita Sharma who is talented and is a much sort after girl in college. She is already committed to Vaibhav whom she sends letters talking about her daily life, emotions and experiences. Under the company of her friends, she gets into a relationship with abhi, at the same time continuing her love for Vaibhav. After completing her graduation, she gets into one of the top MBA colleges of the country, while abhi couldn't make it. This leads to a end of her relationship with abhi and then she meets Joseph.

Within six months, Ankita lands up in a mental hospital.

What happens to Ankita next? What about Vaibhav, Abhi, Joseph? The book revolves around the breath-taking mystery of these people's lives and Ankita's story!

Something I Feel Strongly About

I am a very melodramatic person, the queen of over-reaction. So it’s natural for me to feel really strongly about everything around me, stronger than I am supposed to.

But since I am supposed to speak about just one topic so here it goes.

I feel strongly about giving attention and importance to a person. I seriously get turned off when I see someone speaking and the person who is supposed to listen doesn’t even care. Dude at least listen to what he/she has to say, then decide whether it’s important or not. You are not the almighty that you will be right always. Even a little word from your so called “INSIGNIFICANT’S” mouth can rule the world sometimes.

Then again let’s say the “INSIGNIFICANT” calls you up or text’s you, sometimes maybe due to some important reason. You don’t even have the basic courtesy to reply back? How busy or important are you? Sometimes I really feel smacking hard on your face for this rudeness of yours!

Just read this and think of how your actions and ignorance may affect the other person, specially when he/she gives you a teeny weeny bit importance in their lives....

5 Ways To Win My Heart

Hmm, really nice topic.... I have always wanted to write about this, but I really don't know how can someone win my heart. 

I just happens, have never noticed how.

But since I really have to make a list, so here it is.... *Deep breath!!*

1. Make me laugh

I don’t like showing off my inner emotions on my face. So you will always find me cheerful and smiling. If you really wanna win my heart make me laugh, I mean a real laugh, which comes from my inside :D

2. Give me attention

People generally consider me a kid. I really hate it when I am talking about something serious and no one listens to me (Actually people never listen to me :’()
So please listen to me when I talk. Even I can talk sense sometimes!

3. Don't hide from me

I hate it when people lie to me and then I find out. It seriously hurts man! Specially when it’s about something close.
Trust me, however big or bad your secret maybe, I do understand.

4. Be Yourself

I don’t like when people change for me. Change makes you miserable. 

Be yourself. If I like you I shall like you for what you are. 

Similarly don’t expect me to change for you.

5. Little treats

 The easiest way to make me happy and smiling is giving me little treats.  It maybe in the form of food, gifts or just simple talk to make me special.  A few jokes to make me smile or just something to make me seem important...

A tribute to Final Years

In a few days, NIT Durgapur will become a past for you. It will become what your school, your classmates has been - A memory.... NIT Durgapur will go down in a golden frame as perhaps the four best years of your life.

Still it seems like yesterday. Cracking AIEEE, celebrating with family, counselling, getting irritated that nobody understands the difference between NIT and NIIT, visiting school and teachers one last time before leaving for abode. Some memories still vivid and fresh in the mind, walking inside the Durgapur campus with parents, registration, counselling and the feeling of ecstacy of getting allotted COMPUTER SCIENCE AND ENGINEERING DEPARTMENT. Seems like yesterday- carrying your luggage and moving inside your hostel, in a room, stuffed with another 3-4 fellows. Didn’t know then that in a few days those fellows will grow from “JUST ROOMIES” to “BEST FRIENDS”. 

The homesickness of first semester, getting up early with tears in your eyes, wishing that you were still at home seems funny now. Making new friends, interacting with seniors, doing mischief, bunking class, late night, last hour studies, making cheats for exams, breakfast at jhoops, gathering at back canteen after classes, little treats at techno, Dinner at LH more, GPL’s during birthdays, mass bunks during Festivals, the ID crowd on Wednesday nights will become past after a few days.

All these were your life till today. From tomorrow, these will become memories you will look back and smile at.
These will become fantasies, you will always yearn to get back these four years and live this life all over again. Away from all worries, enjoying life to the fullest with envious resource at your disposal. These days will never come back, but you will always long for these days.

Friends go, friendship remains, only memory lasts forever... 

All the best seniors, wish you all the success in your life.

Finally I would like to conclude with a quote by one of our teachers, Bibhas Sen sir- 

“ These four years are the golden years of your life. Live them to the fullest, you will always cherish them later.”

Tujhe Sab Hai Pataa-Meri Maa

This entry is a part of the contest at BlogAdda.com in association with imlee.com

I owe my life to her. Whatever I am today, it's because of her. Had she not scolded me endless times before my exams, I would never have been a topper. Her faith made me believe in myself.I am being loved and respected because of all the "sanskar" she has inculcated in me and I am proud of myself....

“You know, you are just 17 now. What you feel is natural. Everyone at your age thinks that their parents know nothing, they are enemies, and they don’t love their kids. But a few years down the lane, you will realise how horribly wrong you were and how damn right they had been all this time... “

-A quote by my tutor when I was pissed off at my parents because they didn’t let me go on a school excursion with my friends.....

Dear Ma,

The first time I was walking away from you, I saw tears in your eyes. I thought- oh, give it a break! It was you pestering me all these years. You always said you wanted me away. You chose this. You wanted me to become an engineer, you wanted me to taste hostel life, and now, it’s you who gets to shed the tears. You still get to remain at home, I am the one whom you are sending away to an unknown land, unknown future!!

I didn’t realise then Ma, that one day I would yearn to get back to you. I didn’t realise that the next time I would have to walk away from you, I would be the one to shed tears. I would have to cover my mouth with my hand and bite my lips to stop them from trembling before you. I have become so egoistic and independent that I don’t want you to sense how sad I become just by the thought of parting away from you.

I was happy then Ma, I was excited to leave you; I was elated that I won’t have to live with you anymore. Even when you were setting up my room in my hostel, I stopped you. I felt like telling you- Seriously! Every time? Grow up, I am not a kid anymore, I can take care of myself. Just leave me alone and go, let me savour my independence.

After bidding you and Baba goodbye, I was so happy, I heaved a big sigh of relief. I danced around celebrating being away from you.

I remember Ma, how you used to tell me to oil my hair, to comb my hair regularly to stop it from falling, to take care of my skin and my health. I didn’t pay heed to you then. I wish I had listened to you. My hair falls so much when I comb it and my scalp hurts. My skin is dry and my feet are chapped. I look like a hideous ghost. I don’t feel like taking care of myself now ma. I am tired of cleaning up my room every day. I hate to wake up every morning and wash my clothes. I cry when I have to cook dinner for myself at the end of a long day because I didn’t get to eat as I was too busy. I can’t concentrate on my studies during exams because of all the daily unavoidable chores.

This independence now haunts me Ma....

Two years down the lane Ma, I have realised how wrong I was. I want to be with you, to be dependent on you. I want you to take care of me.

When you and baba used to force me to go to bed at exact 10 pm, I always cursed you. I felt like I was caged. I wasn’t able to enjoy. I had to sleep when other kids of my age were wide awake playing or doing other fun stuff. Ma, I hated you for forcefully feeding me even when I was not hungry. I held you and baba responsible for me being overweight. I had blamed you for all the bullies I went through because I was fat, I blamed you for not able to fit in a dress I liked at the mall.

I want to come back to you now Ma. Please send me to bed now. Scold me as much as you want. Ma, I don’t get to sleep even for four hours a day. The work pressure here doesn’t let me have a proper meal a day. The stuff they serve in the mess, Ma, that’s not food. It’s so unhygienic that it makes my stomach ache, and they serve the same gooey stuff everytime. I have become so thin that my friends ask whether I am dieting. I want to shout and tell them-

 “I AM NOT DIETING; I JUST DON’T GET TO EAT. ATLEAST THAT’S NOT WHAT YOU CALL FOOD”.

As a kid I had always thought that when I would grow up, when I would have a life of my own, when I wouldn’t have to depend on you any more, I would tell you how much I always wanted to break free from you, how much I cursed you for what my life had been. I always thought you were selfish.

Now I hate myself Ma, for all the wrong feelings that hovered in my brain. I am selfish, I am a coward. I depended on you, I let you take care of me and then I was the one who wanted to stab you. Now I feel like killing myself for thinking like that.

Ma, now I have realised you always wanted to protect me. I wish I had listened to you when you told me that the world is cruel. It has been so brutal and merciless to your daughter, It has broken her heart, made her cry, used her, exploited her like she is some useless filthy piece of cloth, blamed her incessantly, left her alone and weak.

Ma, I am tired now, I am weak. I can’t tolerate this suffering anymore. I am confused and I am sick. I want to run away from this life.

I know ma, it’s too late. I wish I could come back to you, hug you and cry. I wish I could be with you forever so that no one could dare to hurt me anymore.

I am sorry Ma, for whenever I thought you were wrong, for blaming you while you loved me all along. I am sorry Ma, for not being able to decipher the meaning of your tears when I was leaving home, for not realising your concern when I didn’t go to bed at ten, for not understanding why you were so worried to let your daughter get away from you.

Ma, I know that Even though I am far from you, even though I don’t tell you what’s happening in my life, I know that you know me very well, better than even myself.

Tujhe sab hai pata, meri maa....

P.S.-This is a letter, I dedicate to everyone in my family, My Ma, baba and Dada who made me what I am today, who stuck with me at all odds and evens, in my varied moods, even when people came and left. But if you ask me why I addressed this only to my Mom, I would reply with a line my Dad told me while dropping me to school-

“No matter how famous you become, how much you earn, wherever you are in this whole world, never forget your Ma, always take care of her, because no one else can take her place in your life, not even me”

Drained Out

I had a million plans, I knew what to do. I had the future all planned out. But what I didn't know that all those plans would change. Miss know-it-all didn't know it all...

I don’t know why I am feeling so drained out today. Drained out of my thoughts, drained out of my emotions, drained out even of my tiredness. I feel like I am just a puppet, without any soul in it. I don’t know why I am not getting excited today, I don’t know why I am not getting depressed. I don’t know why I don’t feel like doing anything. I don’t know why I am not protesting to do any work.

As I was sitting in my open elective class today, I felt like the life was draining out from me. I wasn’t able to do anything. I wasn’t able to stop it. I just sat there in the first bench, staring at the professor, I didnot understand a thing, I just wrote what my ears heard. At one point I didn’t even notice that my pen had stopped working.

I don’t know why this restless girl inside me is so peaceful today. There is no smile on my face. There are no feelings in my heart. There are no thoughts in my mind. I am finding this post hard to write, I know that after I have finished writing it, it would all seem rubbish. I don’t know what to write yet I am writing it. I am not even having the same thoughts that I have every day. I don’t even care that I have a viva tomorrow and everyone else is studying, while I haven’t yet opened my book.

What has happened to me? Why have I changed so much? Why do I want to rush back to my mother’s arms which I had yearned to leave for whole eighteen years? I am independent now, but I do not love this independence.

I don’t know why....

My Little Fantasies.

Hey, this is for you, my dearest MR. Right (whom I haven't had the chance to meet yet). I have always fantasized about the future, about what you and I will do together. I know it's a bit crazy on my part but you can't control anyone's dreams and fantasies. And I don't think it is a big deal of a crime to dream of small things which might make us happy. And mind you, I am not imagining stuff which we can't do, like I will never tell you to get the moon or star for me. I am not that much insane ( I am a little though :P). But I can wish for small stuffs to do with you, for which I am saving myself :)

So here is the list which I want to do with you, some little you and me moments :)

Getting Wet in The Rain :)

I know after reading this anyone will say, this girl is completely mad. Let 'em say. But I know you will understand.

When ever it rains, I just sit in my room by the window side gazing outside. Even if my friends try and pull me, they can't get me out in the rain. I even remember that once after the hot summers, when the first drops of rain hit the ground, my mum told me to go out and have a shower, it would feel good.

But I am a little too adamant, and too much romanticist. For me getting wet in the rain is something I should do only when you are with me. I want you to watch me when the first drops of rain hit me, to hold me in your arms while I dance in the rain for the first time :)

Coffee tym :)

Yeah, that's an Italian cappuccino!!

I remember the first time I went to CCD on my friend's b'day treat. I took the menu card in my hand and voila! it was there on just the first page. I didn't know then that it was called an "Italian cappuccino". I just called it "the coffee with the heart on top :)"

They saw me grinning and asked me what was I smiling at. I said nothing, and asked them whether anyone of them has tried this before, a few of them said yes. They told me it was really good and I should give it a try.

I looked back at the card, smiled and told them-"not today, some other time :)"

I hope Mr. Right, you know now why I didn't have it then and what time I am waiting for....

I Love Hugs

I know I don't need to tell you this. I know that you know the perfect way to soothe me when I am depressed or angry. But still listen to my story...

Everyone knows I am a drama-queen, princess of over reaction. Little things can make me roll on the floor with laughter, or get me crying out loud or even make my face red with anger. By little things I mean things so meager that no other person would even react, but I told ya, I am different.

So dear, when I am depressed or angry, you don't have to try very hard, just give me a tight hug. You don't even need to say anything if you don't want to, but make me feel that you are always with me <3

Lonely Wanderers

I am a lover of solitude. By solitude I don't mean only me but just you and me :)

No matter how much I enjoy being with my friends or being with your friends, I would love to spend a lot of time only with you, doing stuff either of us or both of us like. Some little you and me moments.

We can go out on a long drive at night, somewhere calm and peaceful, maybe stop midway to appreciate the beauties of nature and come back in the morning. Or we can discuss what to do even later. I am just giving an example :)

Ahhh, finally done with this. I know this has been a long post and many of you won't read it. Those who will read it will find me insane. But I know there's one guy out there who will find this totally perfect and completely sane. The one who will acknowledge all my little fantasies.

I am waiting for that one guy and this post is for him :)

Broken Heart

She woke up with tears in her eyes. She didn’t realise when she dozed off while crying last night. She was now awake, but the tears had not yet stopped. They were uncontrollable. Last night she was inflicted with the greatest pain of all times, nothing else could surpass that. Last night her heart was broken, down to pieces, her dreams were shattered.

She could feel the heaviness in her head and the emptiness in her heart. She doesn’t know why it all happened last night. But she remembers each little detail of the moment when her heart was been attacked slowly and steadily, bit by bit, till it broke down to small pieces. She doesn’t know why she didn’t protest, why she didn’t fight back. And all this was done by the person she loved the most.

She hated herself. For giving him her heart to play with. She blamed herself for whatever happened to her. She hated herself, for letting him do it again and again.

Today morning when she woke up, her eyes were still wet, her broken heart wasn’t ready to accept that it all happened. She wished it was all a bad dream, that it would pass and things would be fine.

But her mind knew, all this was pointless. None of it was a dream. It was all real and her brain remembers each little detail.

She wiped her tears with both her hands and got down from her bed. Today is 14^th February. She would be spending Valentine’s Day alone.

Emptiness

I don’t know why I do this to myself....

Why don’t I feel the same way for someone else as I feel for you?

Why does my heart feel empty without you yet I can’t let anyone else fill it for me?

Why do I do the things that reminds me of you when all I should be doing is forgetting you and moving on?

It takes a lot of pain and courage to stop myself from talking to you, to stop myself from calling you up, to make me turn my face around when I see you.

It’s really painful to know that what I want is wrong, that it will hurt me, break me down to pieces, destroy me completely yet I want it so desperately, I don’t want to let go, I want to fight till my last breath. All these just because of the momentary happiness I get from being with you.

They tell me to move on, to get over you, to forget you. You who recently occupied a large portion of my life. But I can’t. Only because of the heat of the moment, the voice that still rings in my ears, the words still clearly etched in my mind, that smile that made my day, that touch that sent me flying into the sky. I didn’t see that the sky was dark, that it would pour heavily,  it would take all down with it and wash it all away  leaving an emptiness lurking it’s way  inside my heart.

 I knew it was going to fall apart some day, yet I desperately tried holding on to it, hoping that maybe it’s all a bad dream, that it will pass.

I don’t know why I am doing this to myself....

Maybe because sometimes I like the pain, the pain from remembering you. It has taken the place in my heart which was left by you. You left, leaving the pain with me, which doesn’t let me forget you.

I have got used to the emptiness. I have fallen in love with the pain.....

P.S- This post was written long ago, just made up my mind today to post it :)

I am not so perfect

I am a drama-queen, princess of over-reaction.

I am really passionate about the work I like to do, I can even go days without sleep. For the works I don’t like, I am always sleeping.

I like being alone, sitting in my room in solitude doing some reading or writing, rather than going out with people and making a lot of commotion, but when I am out, I enjoy the most.

No matter, whether I am happy, sad, and angry or depressed, you will always find me smiling and laughing, only the very close ones get to know what’s on my mind.

I don’t learn from heart-breaks, I just hope, the next time it would be better

I like listening to Westlife wishing that life could be as romantic as they say

I don’t like getting wet in the rain because I am waiting for the guy who will hold my hands while I dance in the rain.

If I am angry on you, it goes away just the moment I tell you how angry I was and why.

Whenever I see babies, I wish I was married and had a kid of my own with whom I can play all day without any objection without anybody else

Yes, I do fantasize about how my future can be, mixed with perfections and imperfections. None of them has happened yet, yet that doesn’t stop me from dreaming.

I am very restless, when I start a work; I wish it will be perfect at the first shot

I sometimes make illogical statements because I am too lazy to modify what’s in my head before speaking.

I don’t mind being imperfect. As a matter of fact I don’t even want my soul-mate to be perfect.

I am proud of being who I am.....

The girl at the auditions

The Panel that selected the girl

 One thing that the girl always cherishes is the SAE auditions. A year has rolled by since the day she gave her auditions where Shubham asked her whether she wanted to get into SAE because she wanted to learn how to ride a bike, Niran crossed off HTML from her form because she couldn’t say the code to make a link open in a new tab, VG made her promise that no matter what happens, even if her work is not acknowledged, she will never leave the creative team for the technical. 

The girl now is a member of the panel

Today, a year later the girl is on the other side. She has a totally different experience. A year ago, her hands were cold while she was sitting before a panel of 7-8 interviewers shooting different questions to judge her, now is one amongst the panel – playing different roles of a interviewer, critic and  consoler as and when time demands. Situations have changed. Shubham has become more serious, Niran seems calmer, VG hasn’t changed, she did hear him give the same speech to another student, the one which she got to hear a year back herself. And there are many more people who have come into the scene- Madhyama, Rintu, Subhankar, Tejaswi, Saurav, Apoorva, Indra, Shouvik, Nimit, Manali, Daksh, Partha, Abhishek, Rahul, chandap, Samarth, Ashish, Satish, Sohini, Neeru, Garima and obviously the girl herself.

Testing the candidates

Questions asked varied in context and difficulty level to test the interviewee in every field, to extract the best in them.  Each candidate was tested for administration, technical and creative stuff. Even situations were presented to review the candidate’s reaction in such situations. The girl even wondered that how simple topics like value of root 2 or c.c or making a six out of IX can become important criteria for selections.

Rahul and the girl supervising team OMNI

There were a lot of enjoyable moments. Topics like PMC, MUKTI ka MZ4, convincing the dean’s daughter, taking girls in boy’s hostels for orientation, keeping boys and girls separate during DJ night, selling pens and key rings to committee members sent everyone rolling on the floor with laughter. In the third round, the candidates were checked for their capabilities of working in a team, multitasking and completing a set of tasks in a given time under the supervision of second years. Needless to say, everyone did a wonderful job.

The girl was amazed to see the dedication, passion and enthusiasm of the candidates and the team. She saw it all, she lived it all. She had the fun and experience of a lifetime.

As the wheels of life moves on, as the entropy of the universe changes, as days pass by, life moves towards an unknown destination. One batch leaves, the other comes, but the engine will never stop roaring.

The ones who came

Colours

I know I said I would be MIA for a while but I really couldn’t concentrate on my studies without a little blogging

The festival of Holi is here. I couldn’t get a more relevant post on this day. Have you ever wondered what does each colour clothes you wear signify? Here’s something I think you will enjoy.

         If you wear RED you are impulsive, excitable, energetic, ambitious and like things to happen quickly when you want them to do so. Red is a good stimulant and the amount of red is directly related to the amount of energy perceived.

        If you wear BLUE you are creative, perceptive, sensitive, intelligent, self-reliant and have a great depth of feeling. You have a good imagination and practical approach to life. Blue invokes calmness and rest. Blue is seen as trustworthy, dependable and committed. You like to do things in your own time and not be rushed.

     If you wear GREEN you are a cautious person and not inclined to trust others easily. You are an observer in life but don’t wish to get involved more than you are supposed to. Green is seen as tranquil and refreshing

      If you wear WHITE you have a positive, well-balanced and optimistic personality. White projects purity, cleanliness and neutrality. You seek a simplified life-style free from outside pressures

     If you wear BROWN you are a honest, down to earth person who likes a structured supported lifestyle. It signifies stability, reliability and approachability. A lover of the best things life has to offer, you are a sensous type

   If you wear PURPLE you are intuitive and have deep feelings and high aspirations. You are sensitive and compassionate so can be easily imposed upon. You are interested to be the best in everything including friends. 

j        If you wear ORANGE you are competent, self oriented and impatient. Orange is the colour of practicality and creativity. You are excitable and seek dominance over others.

    If you wear BLACK you are a strong willed, opinionated and disciplined person. Black is authoritative and powerful because black can evoke strong emotions too much can be overwhelming. You are too inflexible and too independant.

      If you wear YELLOW you have an interesting and stimulating personality. Yellow shines with optimism, enlightenment and happiness. You like to be active in whatever is going on.